Hi there, my name is Meg and just a week ago I was a student, wrapping up eight months of practicum at The Cove. Now I’m writing this from the beach, unwinding after that very transformative experience. I wanted to put a few of my learnings into writing in case it’s helpful for anyone else about to embark on this journey. First things first, I will tell you straight up that these eight months of practicum have been one of the most humbling and stretching experiences of my life, but also been one of the most rewarding! You’re about to learn a lot, but assuming you’re on the right path, it’s all in a good direction, so I encourage you to embrace the growth, as uncomfortable and intimidating as it might be. Here is a non-exhaustive list of ten simple things I’ve learned along the way.

The difference between mock sessions with classmates and real sessions with clients is very noticeable

This was one of the first things I noticed, and I won’t lie, it was a bit intimidating! There was a very tangible feeling of having the ‘safety net’ pulled out from underneath me at the beginning of practicum as it dawned on me that these sessions were not with my sweet classmates, who sometime told me in advance what we’d be discussing, who often kindly played along with my attempts at interventions, and who gave me helpful feedback after every mock session. No, these were real clients, looking for tangible support, and the weight of that did feel quite intimidating in those first few months. Especially for the deep feelers in the room – prepare your heart to feel an immense responsibility and a deep care for these beautiful humans that find themselves on your couch and on your screen.

You might feel like you’re drowning for a little while

For me, practicum felt like jumping straight into the deep end. You take all that you’ve learned, and all your best intentions, and you just start (under the careful guidance of your supervisor, of course). The especially difficult part was having many new clients at once, each coming to me with a lifetime of stories and experiences, and each with their own unique concerns and goals… I found that to be a lot to process and hold all at once. My supervisor mentioned that with her full schedule, she generally only has one new client every few months, so even she thought that having 15 new clients within two months must be a lot to hold, and for a few months I did find my mind swimming with all the details and stories and possibilities for treatment.

You do learn how to hold it all (and let go of it too)

Therapist burnout is real, and there are some really important pieces you can start incorporating into your life now that will help later – self-care practices, strong boundaries, and both personal and professional supports, including your own therapy. Nothing cute or fun to say about all that – you’re just gonna need it.

School really does prepare you.

I was very worried I’d get in the therapy room and not feel ready, but I was delighted and relieved to find that the person-centered approach I was drawn to in my schooling, and the constant emphasis my professors placed on the therapeutic alliance gave me a solid foundation: simply showing up authentically with warmth, curiosity, and an empathetic and non-judgmental presence was exactly where I needed to start, every time, with every person. Techniques and interventions absolutely matter, and your knowledge, skills, and repertoire will grow over time, but it is absolutely true that the deepest work happens within the safety of the therapeutic alliance itself.

Trying a new intervention is both scary and thrilling.

As you learn, I encourage you to go out on a limb when you feel ready, even if you’re scared. As therapists, we get to learn the most interesting techniques and interventions in our training and courses, and that learning is meant to extend to our clients. The first time my client tried Somatic Tracking with my gentle direction, or wrote a self-compassionate letter to herself, or spoke to his father through the Gestalt empty chair technique, or developed her Calm Place as a resource we could use at the end of our sessions, the feeling was like no other. There will always be times it doesn’t land… clients might not feel comfortable trying something new, or might find it’s not working for them, or maybe it’s just the wrong intervention for that moment. However, when it clicks, and helps a client move towards their goal, there is a palpable electricity in the room for both the client and the therapist that is truly satisfying, and reminds me why I wanted to do this work in the first place.

Consider the therapeutic frame – everything around the therapy really matters.

Before your first session, and then every so often, try sitting in the client’s chair, and see how the room feels. Are the lights too bright? Does the room feel warm and welcoming? Should you have snacks available, not just because it’s nice, but because you’ve noticed that some of your clients can hardly get out of bed to get to session? Do they know where to park? How about your cancellation policy – has it been clearly communicated? Does your client know what will happen if they or you have an emergency? What about the timing of the session – have you considered how committed you are to ending exactly at the 50-minute mark? Have you left enough time in the session for them to feel grounded before they leave your office? What might you gain or lose in the alliance by going over time, most of the time? I could go on and on with different elements to examine here – there is so much to consider outside of the therapy itself.

Lean on your supervisor.

Your goal is not to impress them, they are there as a resource. I’m sure not everyone is as emotional as me, but my supervision session is where I brought all the weightiness, all my worries, all my insecurities about this new role, and over and over again they were met with so much grace and curiosity, giving me the space to explore what my underlying fears and concerns were. From there, my supervisor was able to use her wisdom and years of experience to help me find a practical way forward, and that resource was a gift I leaned on week after week. If there’s a new intervention you want to try, don’t be shy to roleplay it with your supervisor first – they can help you fine tune things in a way you simply can’t do on your own.

You will find your “voice”

At the beginning of my practicum I felt pretty uncomfortable in my own skin. I worried that I sounded like a textbook, or someone cosplaying as a therapist, always making sure I was reflecting, paraphrasing, and asking open-ended questions in just the  “right” way. Over time, though, I started to trust myself and let my own voice, along with my personality and passion, come through. As the wonderful Irving Yalom says, “the most valuable instrument the therapist uses is the therapist’s own self” and I’ve found this to be so true. In general, your clients won’t choose to stay with you because of your perfect interventions or your efficiency in meeting their goals, but because they connect and feel safe with you, and you create the grounded and attuned atmosphere in which they feel comfortable to explore and heal. As therapists, we are not meant to be distant observers, or experts with all the right answers, but to quote Yalom again, we are “fellow travelers,” walking alongside our clients as they grow, removing obstacles as they persist on their difficult paths, and encouraging them in their journey.

Don’t be scared of silence.
At first, silence made me panic – am I failing here? Is this awkward? But I have learned that silence often holds more weight than words. Clients need time to process, they need room to think and feel, and when you can sit with the quiet instead of rushing to fill it, really profound things can happen. A tip from my supervisor helped me a lot: some clients find silence uncomfortable or even anxiety-provoking, so we can help by placing a gentle container around it. This might sound like, “If it’s okay with you, let’s just sit together quietly for a moment.” By naming the silence and giving it permission, you create more safety for the client to settle into it.

Practicum will bring up your own sh*t… and that’s the point.

The countertransference is real in those first months. Everything you thought you had already worked through and healed from has a sneaky way of resurfacing when you’re sitting with clients and attuning to their struggles. This can feel unsettling, but it’s actually an incredible opportunity that I think we ought to embrace. With a journal handy (and regular visits to my own therapist), I learned to face what was stirred up and use it as fuel for growth. By doing this work, I am able to show up as a steadier, more grounded presence for my clients. As Sue Johnson so beautifully explains, it’s the client’s connection with a secure “other” (in this case, their therapist) that gives them steady ground under their feet so they can reach up and grow. What a gift that it is essentially built into our job description to continue in our own growth and healing, not because we need to be perfect or some kind of superhuman, but always with the natural result of being a more grounded presence in the therapy room.

Of course, I could go on and on… being a student therapist has been rewarding, challenging, humbling, and profoundly human work and I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything. I’m so looking forward to continued learning, growth, and expansion as both a therapist (and a human in general) as I continue on as a therapist at The Cove.

Meg is a therapist (former intern therapist!) at The Cove Therapy. She’s probably reading in one of her favourite cafes, right now. If you’d like to connect with Meg, you can find her at meg@thecovetherapy.ca